Mean People SUCK

I wish I could look back on school memories fondly, but I just can't. I had such a rough time in school. We didn't have money, and I wore the same clothes a lot. In fact, one boy graciously pointed it out to me one day, in front of a huge group of people, "You need to get some new clothes."

Duh! Thanks for pointing that out, because I had no idea.

There really wasn't much I could about the clothing I wore. I couldn't even afford thrift store clothing. And getting a part-time job was really a catch 22 because I had no car- or friends to take me there.

This probably explains why I'm so fascinated with fashion now. I just want to be near it! Sometimes I wish I could buy big bags of clothes, go back in time, and hand deliver them to myself. I'd probably blow the 1990's people's minds away with my 2012 duds. I could totally rock that.

Did I also mention I was underweight by about 10 pounds? And I wore braces. Yeah. It sucked. Being 5' 6" and weighing 107 pounds is not a good look. And don't even ask me how my parents afforded braces. I'm sure they don't even remember how they did it. But, thank God they did, because my teeth were horrific!

I'm not sure what the catalyst is for mean girls in school. Hatred? Insecurity? Boredom? All of the above? I don't know, but I just wanted them to leave me alone. Sometimes being a super-nice person, gets you in trouble. I suppose I appeared to be the weakest link, giving them the strongest inclination to pick on me. One group of girls I tried to "join" decided it would be fun to hit me with their lunch kits on the playground in 5th grade. Another girl from my 5th grade art class, either made fun of the way I pronounced "crayon" on a daily basis or played the "ignore anything she says" game. I became a shadow.

That same girl, took a feminine pad, (yes this really happened) colored it red with a magic marker, wrote, "Nina started!" and stuck it to the wall in the girls public restroom. So. Humiliating. I was only 11 years old.

In 9th grade, a girl in my English class who sat behind me, would thump my neck all through class, and whispered in my ear that I was a "bitch" repeatedly. I was petrified of attending that class. Plus, she was that type of girl who you could tell, didn't give a flying fuck about getting into trouble, making her all the more terrifying. She told me if I told on her, that she'd beat me up after school.

And who could forget 10th grade, when a girl yelled out to me in the hall one day, "Bitch!" and proceeded to beat the living shit out of me in front of all the people in the school. Being 107 pounds might sound like a dream come true to some girls, but on that day it didn't come in handy. I was thrown around like a rag doll. This girl had so much pent-up rage it was unreal, and I was obviously the perfect person to unleash it upon. I found out later the reason she went so ballistic is that her best friend had been arrested for possessing cocaine at school. I ended up losing a quarter size circle of hair near the front of my head. It was a mess all over the floor. And the worst part is, my peers gathered around us, egging it on, yelling and hollering, throwing their arms up in the air.

My saving grace was literally my older brother, Chris, a senior at the time, who heard the commotion in the hall and saw it was his sister getting beat up. He picked up the girl, and slam dunked her to the floor. And in an act of pure chivalry, he picked me up off the ground, and carried me to the nurse's office like a baby. I was limp, scratched up, shaking and crying. Thank God for that brother. Thank you, Chris.

I got beat up again in 11th grade. This time it was in a class room, in the morning, when no one was around. She threw me across the room, I became a human bowling ball, knocking over all the desks. No one even saw it. So, of course no one would believe it happened. And my older brother, Chris, had already graduated, so no savior this time.

Another girl threatened to kill me in high school. I am not even kidding. Not even a little.

I'm not writing this for pity. I'm writing this, because, I want everyone to see how awful bullying is. People need to see this. They need to know how real it is. People you're friends with today, might have been bullied. I bet you'd never have guessed how bad I was bullied. It can happen to anyone.

And it's happening in every city- not just the big ones. This happened in a very small town in Texas. That whole, "everybody knows each other in a small town and is your friend" bullshit isn't real.

This is why I have such a low tolerance for injustice. I protect people I love to a fault. I pity the fool who tries to mess with my kids.

So, the moral of the story is, if you're reading this and you are currently a bully or once were, you ought to be ashamed of yourself. Picking on who you perceive to be the weakest, only shows how pathetic and low you are. And if, on the other hand, you are the one being picked on, I send you my deepest sympathy, all my love, and I wrap you in white light from God a thousand times over. You are wonderful and special, and good things will come your way.

I never in a million years, while living in that shit-hole of a city as a kid, believed I'd one day be a designer, living in Los Angeles, married to a brilliant writer, with a beautiful daughter. It worked out for me better than I ever imagined. And it can happen to you too.

Stay strong, power through, get your education, and succeed. Succeed at being happy. Succeed at finding love. Succeed at helping others. Succeed at fulfilling all your goals. If the bullies worked half as hard at achieving positive goals as they did threatening, belittling and berating you, they'd probably be millionaires. Beat 'em to it.

Love you guys!